God, you feel good!

the early morning sun
my face caresses
warming much more than skin
the joy my face expresses
is unbounded
knowing no pain
or hint of darkness

pure energy, it becomes
peace like a pool of water
spread in the midst of the desert
comfort and blessing
restoring my harried mind
cooling the heat
quieting the confusion
allowing me to just be

I have nowhere to go
no one to worry about
I am a child, playing
on a green grassy slope
watching the clouds as I am laying
where time as the sky floats by.

no time for Zeroes anymore

I used to have goose egg days when i figured the amount of value I had added to my life or to others was a ZERO. I am pretty sure that was just a mistaken notion and a fabrication of a depressed mental state that wanted a reason to beat up on myself. We all do that some, my family seemed better at it than some others. Dad was easy going, mom was hard, even on herself, and to this very day has not learned to relax the standard she has long held; that a day without WORK is a day of shame, a day thrown away, and one which should put you in fear of judgment from God, Himself, at your doorstep, with His divine clipboard of who did and who did not earn their right to breathe today.
I am like my dad in many of the good traits, and crazy is one of them. Crazy about the world around me, crazy when its raining outside ( or sunshining). I get crazy at the top of tall trees and on rooftops. I am crazy in love.
with the help of several good therapists I am appreciating myself and my unique gifts that I bring to this world, to my family and the gifts within that are private, for me alone to enjoy.
- - - - - Suffice it to say that I will always get to the end of each day and say, I did good today. I am worth a lot not because of WHAT I did so much as WHO I am and the spirit and love and joy that I possess and demonstrate in my daily life.

dangling

I feel like I am dangling my feet over the edge of a bridge called 'Rational thought'
and my toes are numbing themselves in the cold hard waters of an illusionary world
that only my mom can see or feel. Damn it is scary to see someone lose their self confidence and their sense of place, position or power. The ghosts of some other reality are playing on her emotions and giving her a hell of a time. My job? bring it all back with a reminder that her beagle ( whom i despise) is her steadfast pal and faithful ( yeah right????) guardian. If he is here, all is well.

Facebook ate my homework

sad to say that something akin to a virus infected me.
a silly click and paste farm game that took over all waking hours
and some of the sleeping ones. it destroyed my blog, and allowed REAL plants to be left without water
while the virtual ones were "oh so pretty".
ENOUGH of that.
I know what is real,
and i appreciate good fun and healthy distraction in the depths of winter
but darn it, this is summer and there are boats to sail and campgrounds to be visited.
and if I don't do it, who will..????

good bye Farmtown
Hello W R I T I N G !

Dear Arizona

I am not sure what you did to make a few powerful and influential people hate you, but I know it is wrong to "stick your nose in some one else's business"! The trouble is your business and the rest of the states are linked. When you get over run by invaders, they are on their way to some where north of you. When burlap back packs full of weed get past your guard it ends up getting peddled to our middle school kids.
I just wanted to say thanks, to your state legislature and your governor for taking a stand. please be patient with me - when it cools off, after labor day, I will be coming over to say thanks in person.
Look for me in the RV with the big I <3 Arizona bumper sticker.
Fro now, be patient, and know that you are doing good.

it was a perfect day