friday fidget

I had a great walk the other night - it was late when there were few cars out and even less people.
Only a few dogs barked at me as I walked the empty streets under a star-filled sky.
I found something about walking that was neat: you think different thoughts that when you are driving. Take for instance I never looked at my fuel gauge and thought about how soon I would need to fill up and how it costs WAY too much to do so.

As I walked I noticed the feeling in my legs ( ouch) of stretching muscles and felt the warmth generated by the burning of calories. I noticed this most on slight uphill slopes. I could hear my breathing and the chirping of bats that flew overhead collecting insects.

I thought about my life, and how it's going, and that I seem more in control than I can recall in the recent past. ( This delusion could be from the strain of walking ) maybe its not MY control that I am sensing so much as my tuning in to the concept of order. Happy Friday!

Night watchman

Edward slept in his work clothes, the Remington Wingmaster 12 guage rested near his left hand and three shells were in the pocket of his jeans. Mildly uncomfortable on a strange bed, but strangely at ease in the dark, and with the thought that an angry man may walk through the front door. It would be up to the shotgun and himself to see that the 'bad guy' did no harm and was made to answer for the crime of breaking and entering. while he is not sure if his anger is hot enough to shoot this man, clearly he will defend self and this home if needed and be sure to subdue the lowlife until the police arrive.
To his surprise he sleeps deeply, and woke once or twice in the strange room to what seemed to be a sound at the door. Waiting in silence, hoping to determine if that sound was real or imagined. No more noises, no night creeping creep.
It's colder now so Edward adjusts a cover, resuming his watch, through closed eyes.
The dog will alert on any sound or nearby motion, so he dozes again, waking as dawns first grey streaks push back the night and reveal a calm both inside and out. He leaves now, happy that on this night he saw nothing, never had to load the gun, and yet accomplished his purpose.

Slay me!

Can the words of Paul, formerly Saul of Tarsus still speak for God to his people today?

I urge you bretheren,
by the mercies of God,
to present your bodies
a living and holy sacrifice,
acceptable to God...

Rom 12-1

That was enough for me to sit up and take notice. I felt that again God wanted me to hear this with not just my ears, but within my heart. I contemplated it all day Sunday, and I am still working through what it means to me to be living, and holy and offered to God.


The novel of England that I am reading, Sarum,
has plenty of sacrifices in it, druid, pagan; animal and human.
None of them end up living sacrifices.
They seem in large part anything but holy.
Sometime the druid priests would select criminals for execution.


Does God want me, my self, my body?
Hard to understand, but it is possible.
God owned me before I knew His name and now much moreso since I accepted His son as my Lord. My belonging to Him is a fact of creation and a result of yielding my will.

Why would the writer, Paul, tell believers to offer their bodies?
I readily admit that I don't know. yet I want to understand this.
Why not offer God our minds? Think holy thoughts, contemplate His greatness all day.
I think our minds are too easy to give and too easily deceived.
Where we live, daily, is in our bodies; in the pain and the pleasure, in the feast and the famine.
I want my living to be closer to the holy that God deserves from me.
I dedicate my arms and legs, my eyes and ears, my strength and weakness to the purpose of giving glory to the Father of all. It is what I am meant to do, and what I am designed to be.
I think.

tribute 2996 - coming soon

I am honored to participate in the 2996 blogs of tribute to the fallen of September 11 on the anniversary - I was asssigned a name of a man to write a tribute about, and I will be putting that together in the coming months. You can join too, just send me an email or comment and I will link you up. or you can Google 2996 its not far down the list.

I am finding a new joy in hearing from God and in church this Sunday He was very clear in using Romans 12:1 to 8 to help me see what was needing changed in my life.


I hope to be faithful to the message and to the God who sent it.
Pray for me.

Project China 2006

Project China 2006
the Music director from out church posts are about the current trip to China.

Fears - what is this

Fear:
it crops up from time to time
to challenge my normal quietude
In my heart and based on God's promises I know I will never be wanting
fear of starving to death is not the issue, fear of always being under this sort of pressure is.

In God's family I have acceptance, love, and a place to contribute
I just fear that I am not enough like the other children to belong
its this sort of fear that is irrational, yet real

I wasted a lot of my younger years, I wasted some of my middle years
I don't think it would be smart to waste any more time.
I need to figure some things out and be SURE this time.

I like my life, and yet I know there is more
I liked my 50th year, with all the ups and downs
and the arrival of summer has me in a good place
with many opportunities to grow in trust and
to practice decision making not based on fear.

bug zapping time again

living near a meadow -
with plenty of water
its time to KILL kill kill!
send the mosquitos to the hungry toads feeding under this beautiful light.