Thursday, June 09, 2005

Totally useless Q-tips

Someone has to think of a new use for Q- tips.
They do not work as an ear cleaning tool if
you follow the cautionary warning on the box.
"Do not insert into ear canal"
Uhh, that is why I bought them.
I am quite sure that is why they made them.
If someone has a old box from the sixties could you check
the label to see if it tells you HOW to use them? I think not.
People were smarter then and lawyers had real jobs to do.
Now the lawyers write cautionary labels:
"Always wear ear, eye, nose and lymphatic protectors before using this nail clipper. Not for use on anything but average American toenails,
there is a risk of fungal distribution, use of this product may result in shorter nails."

I love the Prop 65 Cancer warning for the state of California,
which must be costing us billions.
Paraphrasing for you:
'This product contains chemicals that when given to lab rats in huge doses caused them to swell up, eat more, poop less, run in left circles and grow big bulges on their hairy bodies.
The state of California knows this and lets them sell it anyway, because you said you wanted whiter teeth, softer skin and paint that would actually cover in one coat.
Now you have all three in one product.
Please wear eye, ear and nose protection when using this product

Yes you may apply the paint with a Q-tip! it is safe if you keep it away from your ears.

4 comments:

Eddie said...

stockdiscussion.blogspot.com

David said...

uhh Eddie, can you tell is how you really feel? Don't hold back

Jayleigh said...

david, you're such a riot... in honor of your blog, I refuse to check out eddie's blog... plus I vow never to use nail clippers ever again... **hugs**

blog high priest said...

jay,
the Blog is pleased with your offering. smoke arises in a favorable way to signify the purity of your sacrifice. Others would do well to follow your fine example. Blessings upon your home expansion project