women in my history

 real, imaginary... biological and otherwise related

women have profoundly affected my life thus far

thanks MOM for wanting a brown eyed boy, here I am and the eyes that saw so clearly for 64+years have cataracts and through surgeries, new lenses, Yay

Mom was a superb example to me of Faith and works, of Grace and mercy, of being strict, but understanding the boy in me that took so long to grow up.

Heaven (did) help the women I dated in High School and college, I was a fun fool, and a clueless clown.  Hope I did not ruin anyone permanently. I may have been ruined, but not by any ONE woman, nor permanently, but every encounter led to  

strange dreams, and weird movie

 I can't control my dreams

I should control the TV Remote

We watched the movie "Bliss" and it blew my mind

good acting, wandering plot, that I can't fully explain here

-------------------------------------------------------

My mind went back to my darker days , post divorce

when I could NOT get my act together, and people had to step in and help: am I responsible to apologize to them, now, for the costs of my care? for the costs of my negligence, I must make amends with those who were closestd and may have suffered ( silently) as I went through my depressed days and lonely winters. 

I only take credit for this, the life I entrusted to God has been lived with trust in Him, and grace from both Him and my family.

Others were with me on my crazy journey and some just watched as I wandered about, not always having anything (nice) to say 

To all I owe a debt, and a responsibility to do better, and walk in the wisdom and stability I now have.

to God be all the glory

friends help the children from the reservation

 https://www.aicm.org/child-sponsorship.html

so sad that we waste food, while others hunger

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcVNFJn7NgI

longing to be free

 I want freedom...   who doesn't?

I long for the freedom that only Christ can give.

to take my first big step in that direction I deleted my major  social media account

I feel better already.  now to fill that mental space and time with higher thoughts

there are some I will miss and of course a time of adjustment

yet, i will be healthier, and I have plenty of other places to express that:

Joe Biden is a cheat and a liar

His son is guilty,  Jeffry Epstein did not kill himself

BHO Barry Soetero  Obama was the worst president since Billary

worship as a spectrum

 our lives can be graphed as a spectrum of highs and lows, our bright moments and dark.

our meals range from frugal to suptuous

Our conversations can be short and sweet or long and luxuriously intimate

why not so with God?

what if worship had as many facets as your human relationships?

start with a stretching as you wake ( it is good to feel my body rising)

as lots of random thought cram into your brain, ask God, What is important to HIM

when you see the sun, KNOW it is for your benefit, your life depends on that glowing orb

society exists to make your life possible ( we could NOT live alone) 

so we celebrate neighbors and friends and family in light of Him who created them

our momentary breath is from Him, so exhale His praises. Our hands should be doing His works

the Joy of the Lord is strength so Let your JOY be plentiful

in Him we live and move and have our being

Just bring Him into every corner of your existence 

and so give Him the worship due His holy goodness

trailers and luggage

 we carry stuff thru life 

we add on as we go 

then we marry, more baggage

divorce, shed some shtuff, add more complex

kids gget a load of baggage

remarry your baggage and hers overload the truck, so you hitch up a trailer

its not to bad .. except uphill.